The One and Only Cause of Failure
in Any Area of Your Life... and the One and Only
Solution
By David Cameron
Author of
How to Love Yourself to Wealth
All we do is create experiences. That
is all we do, as human beings. There is nothing else we
do here on earth.
Think about your whole day today -
wasn't it a collection of one experience after another?
As creators of experiences, we make good ones happen and
almost every day, surprisingly, we put a monkey wrench
in our own lives and mess things up.
Every day, and for no reason at all,
unconsciously, we destroy our own efforts and then fail
or suffer unnecessarily. When it comes to success, we
are our own worst enemy and we don't even know it. We
take one step forward and two steps back, or more. Today
we can all stop this unnecessary step backwards.
Do you know how much more your life,
business, relationships and health would improve if you
changed one little thing? Let us see how.
The one and only
cause of all failure in any area of your life...
In this article, we are going to focus
on work, the experience we most often find ourselves in.
But you can apply the principles to anything else,
including health and relationships. Work in itself is an
experience, and we work so that our 'future' experiences
can be better - or so we hope.
Instinctively, we know that we create
our own experiences, otherwise we would not bother put
any effort into work. And we desire 'good' experiences,
that is why we work so hard, believing that the reward
will be a 'better' life.
You have no doubt in your mind that
you create your experiences - the only doubt you may
have is the extent to which you are in control of the
creation of your own experiences. Furthermore, most of
humanity recognizes that they make the 'good' times, but
they are in denial of the fact that they make the 'bad'
times as well, the 'failures'. They mostly blame other
people and conditions for the bad ones. Well, here is
the biggest reason why we have bad experiences and
failures in our work, business and marketing:
Worry and fear.
That is it. That is what causes all
the failures in our work, marketing, business,
relationships, health and everything else. And do you
know why? Because we become what we think about most.
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Our thoughts create our next
experience, our next moment. We have a mountain of
scientific, spiritual and psychological evidence of this
fact, yet we hear it and forget it.
Quantum physicists have proven beyond
a doubt that the material world is fully dependent on
its observers. They have proven that all matter is made
of energy, and this energy 'arranges' itself into the
matter we see based on the expectations of the observer.
In other words, it is our
intentions, attention and observations that 'collapse'
this energy into matter. This is not scientific
speculation any more. Nobel Prize winning scientists
have proven this without a shred of doubt. And what do
our religions tell us? All our religions, all of them,
tell us that what we believe we become.
The Bible, for example, tells us that
whatever we ask, we receive, whatever we seek, we find,
whatever we believe, we are, and as a man thinketh in
his heart so is he. Whenever you are thinking, you are
asking. Your asking does not start when you start
praying and end when you say 'amen'.
All your thoughts are constant
communication with the universe, communication that is
acted upon exactly. Every thought of fear and worry
that you have produces an outcome in your world. It is
this outcome that you call 'failure that was beyond your
control'. It was never beyond your control - you just
were not conscious of what you were doing and the power
that you had. You have now heard evidence from science
and religion that this is so. Let us now see what
psychologists and philosophers say:
"The psychological rule says that
when an inner situation is not made conscious, it
happens outside, as fate. That is to say, when an
individual remains undivided and does not become
conscious of his inner contradictions, the world must
perforce act out the conflict and be torn into opposite
halves." - Carl Jung
"Much of your pain is self-chosen.
It is the bitter potion by which the physician within
you heals your sick self. Therefore trust the physician,
and drink his remedy in silence and tranquility: For his
hand, though heavy and hard, is guided by the tender
hand of the Unseen." - Kahlil Gibran
"The attempt to escape a problem is
the problem. See the logic of this. When a man tries to
escape, when he moves away from the problem, he divides
himself into one man with a problem and another man who
will escape the problem. In reality, there is no such
division, so the escape must always fail, as the man
sadly experiences. But when seeing that he is the
problem itself, that he and his problem are one, he
stops trying to escape because he sees there is no other
course. In this state of intelligent acknowledgement of
reality, he will not have the problem." - Vernon Howard
"The aphorism, "As a man thinketh
in his heart so is he," not only embraces the whole of a
man's being, but is so comprehensive as to reach out to
every condition and circumstance of his life." - James
Allen
"Whether you believe you can or you
can't - either way you are right" - Henry Ford
How most people
create their lives... and how they get it wrong
Let us now look at how most people go
about creating their lives and their business: They have
a goal, a desire. In terms of work, this goal may be to
advance in their career, to launch a new marketing
strategy, to have their web site achieve success and
high traffic, or whatever else.
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They decide to go for this goal. They
then have countless thoughts about this goal or desire.
A great percentage of those thoughts are worries and
doubts as to whether they will achieve this goal. A
great percentage of these thoughts are analysis of how
they will achieve it and how they may fail. They then
analyze the analysis and analyze that analysis until
what is left is a mass of confusion and fear and doubt.
They reach a point where they don't even know how they
wish the goal to turn out - one confident side of them
says outcome A will happen, then a fear comes up and it
says B, then a newspaper article makes them think C, and
so on.
How does anyone expect anything but
havoc in the outcome of such haphazard thought full of
fear and doubt? You must be like a child. A child, a
small child before they are influences by adults into
fear and doubt, is of one mind, certain of outcome, ever
happy. You can guess how much more successful you would
be with such clear thought.
Worry and fear is the single most
destructive force in this world and in our personal
lives and businesses. Yet we do it every day!
Why? Because we believe it works. It
is that simple.
I was watching an Oprah episode with
Dr. Phillip C. McGraw, author of Self Matters, as the
guest that day. He said, as most others have said
before, that humans do not do anything unless we believe
there is a pay off.
The only reason we worry is that we
believe it works! That is the payoff. As insane as this
idea is, we somehow buy into it. Why? Mainly because we
do not know the future. So we have a goal, then because
we cannot see the future, we have this thought that it
may not come true, so we worry, thinking it will help
us. But because we become what we think about, the very
worry itself comes true.
That which we fear and worry about
materializes. We are worried about things because we are
worried about things. It is a vicious cycle. We believe
what we see yet what we see is created by what we
believe. But that cycle starts in our belief. We change
our belief and reality changes.
So what is the
solution?
Stop worrying and drop your fears.
Time for more evidence. Again, every religion and
spiritual path, not to mention psychologists and
psychiatrists, tell us not to worry. For example, the
Bible tells us "Be anxious over nothing", "Be still",
and so on. But most importantly, we are guided over and
over again into detachment of outcome.
Zen, Buddhism, Hinduism, Christianity,
Islam, and all other faiths, over and over, in various
ways, teach detachment, non-resistance. Letting go. The
very idea of struggle is made necessary because of our
resistance.
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Look at nature. Things work out
without resistance in the most miraculous of ways.
Change must happen in this physical realm. Nothing stays
the same. Yet everything blooms.
Deepak Chopra, in his best-selling
book the Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, outlines
detachment as one of those laws. In any case, what you
resist persists. So if you find yourself resisting an
outcome you do not wish to occur, you are simply
energizing it into occurring.
So why is so much emphasis given by
sages, masters, teachers and guides to be detached, to
let go? Because you do not know every possible outcome,
combination and miracle needed to get to the best
outcome possible at the best time. And because you do
not know, when you feel the need to control what you
don't know, you worry and cause suffering to yourself.
You forget that you are not alone.
The universe is not just made of
physical stuff. There is a Source of the physical, that
which all thought and matter springs from and goes back
into. Spirit is the source that everything, from
yourself to your car to the stars, comes from. It is
First Cause, and eternal. It knows what you do not.
And if you have ever observed your
life, you will notice that often things have come to you
in ways you would never have planned to give an outcome
much better than you would have hoped for. How did that
happen?
See, when you decide to do everything
yourself, including what you know not, you limit
yourself to your fears and finite possibilities. Stick
to what you know and leave the rest to That Which Knows.
If you have a desire to succeed in a
certain thing, express that intension, will it, know
that it shall be acted upon without fail by the
universe, just like all of nature is, and let go, with
faith and certainty. Detach yourself totally from the
'problem', outcome or steps needed for the outcome to
happen.
A goal set with certainty is already
accomplished, and because it is, all the miracles
necessary for its manifestation are already set and will
happen in good time as long as you do not get in the
way. If you start analyzing and worrying, setting
deadlines and conditions, steps and metrics that only
serve to scare you in case you miss them, you are
getting in your own way.
Simply intend, believe, be grateful
because you know it is being taken care of, and leave
it, move on to the next thing. This not only saves you
from failure, but it frees you so much time to intend so
many more things instead of spending hours worrying over
that one thing. Here is a quote that should get you
thinking:
"The lesson is forcibly taught by
these observations that our life might be much easier
and simpler than we make it; that the world might be a
happier place than it is; that there is no need of
struggles, convulsions, and despairs, of the wringing of
the hands and the gnashing of the teeth; that we mis-create
our own evils. We interfere with the optimism of nature;
for whenever we get this vantage-ground of the past, or
of a wiser mind in the present, we are able to discern
that we are begirt with laws which execute themselves.
The face of external nature teaches the same lesson.
Nature will not have us fret and fume." - Ralph Waldo
Emerson
Detachment has been proven to work
over and over. Worry and fear has been proven to destroy
over and over. I saw the following fantastic bit of
information in Joe Vitale's new book, Spiritual
Marketing: "According to research done at Spindrift
Foundation on the power of prayer, a "Thy will be done"
prayer gets more than twice as many results as a
specific "give me this" prayer."
You do not have to be a religious
person. You don't even need to have a religion. The laws
of the universe work uniformly for all, no matter whom
or what they are. And intention with detachment will
work for you regardless.
So there you have it. Focus only on
that which you can do. And the only thing you can
effectively do is intend and enjoy Now.
J. Krishnamurti once said that we
should live "as though one were living for that single
day, for that single hour." Did you know that all
problems exist in the mind in the past and future? Look
at your thoughts of problems. They are all memories or
worries about something in future that has not even
happened yet and can very well be avoided if only you
stopped worrying.
Stop your mental noise, focus on Now,
and you will start having inspiration instead of
worries. Learn how to apply these new ways in your life.
In any field, be it marketing, business, child care,
relationships, health, finances, or whatever, you can
live in this new more effective way.
Let go. Focus only on what you know
and can, and leave the rest to the Source, Providence,
Spirit, the Universe, or whatever other term you find
comfortable. If you don't, you only get in your own way.
Let go and enjoy!